Or Not!
A five-minute immersion exercise to sharpen your verbal joust from a collection of folk Sayings, aphorism, cliches quotations and witty witty words of wisdom
Scarborough Chapter
Mere mortals like you and me don’t have to be poet to understand and appreciate the beauty of words. Here are quotable clichés and sayings from various sources for us to think, ponder and sigh in relief of finally discovering how true the message brings. While tracing their origins can be monumental task for research, try Internet, a valuable ally!
Women and policemen like to listen to confessions.
The difference between Madonna and Mother Theresa is the difference between
FAME and SUCCESS.
There are no incurable diseases, only ignorant doctors.
It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
“The Surgeon General advises that smoking can cause cancer”
“Cancer can stop smoking”
Definition of Atheism: a non-prophet organization.
Motorists warning: If you want to see the beauty of our town,
“DRIVE SLOW”: our cemetery? “DRIVE FAST”
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else
Even the longest way starts with a first step.
Billboard advertisement: “IF YOUR COMPUTER DOES NOT WORK
Follow, lead or get out of the way.
At sunset, even dwarfs cast long shadows.
More people drown in the mug than in the ocean.
Billboard advertisement: “THERE IS BEER IN EVERY CAN”
The only form of suicide sanctioned by society is to work oneself to death.
Habits are spider at first, but turn later into barbed wire.
Look what pen can do as mightier than the sword, “ONE DROP OF INK, THOUSANDS OR PERHAPS MILLIONS THINK”
A drop of luck is better than a barrel of wisdom.
Courier billboard advertisement: “WE CAN DELIVER ANYTHING ANYTIME, ANYWHERE EXCEPT BABIES"
Nodding is easier for an empty head.
Men would let their wives have the last word
If they knew for sure it would be the last one.
Interviewee: “We want somebody to fill this position who is always sober”.
Prospective applicant: “Is that a question or an invitation?”
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
Sign written at the back of a garbage truck:”OUR BUSINESS IS PICKING UP”
It's relatively easy to turn a learned man into a specialist.
But it's very difficult to turn a specialist into a learned man.
A saint has a past, a Sinner a future.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
Birthdays become dangerous when the candles cost more than the cake.
In many offices, the most important head is the letterhead.
Sign at the back of a dental delivery truck: “WE HAVE BEEN TO YOUR DENTIST, HAVE YOU SEEN HIM LATELY?”
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
You will never know the value of water until the well dried up!
“GO SEEK AND YOU SHALL FIND”
1) The reason that WORK kills more people than WORRY is that more people WORRY than WORK!
2) Unhappy is the man who has no nails with which to scratch his head.
3) The things most people want to know are usually none of their business!
4) Do not discourage other people's plan unless you have a better one.
5) A practical nurse is one who falls in love with a wealthy patient!
6) Many are called, fewer are chosen, fewer still get to do the choosing!
7) Remember that AVERAGE is simply the best of the poorest and the poorest of the best!
8) It is a poor workman who blames his tools.
9) DELAY is the deadliest form of denial.
10) You cannot antagonize and influence at the same time!
11) LEAD, FOLLOW or get out of the way.
12) EXPERIENCE is a wonderful thing - it enables you to recognize a mistake everytime you repeat it!
13) Don't learn the tricks of the trade, LEARN THE TRADE!
14) He is truly wise who gains wisdom from another's mishap!
15) If FATE throws a knife at you, there are two ways of catching it: by the blade or by the handle!
16) TEMPER is what gets most of us into trouble, PRIDE is what keeps us there!
17) LIFE is a perpetual drunkeness: the PLEASURE passes but the HEADACHE remains.
18) I am not afraid of the FUTURE for I have seen YESTERDAY but I love TODAY!
19) For the sake of one rose, the gardener became slave of a thousand swords!
20) RUMOR writes faster than TRUTH can erase.
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