Featured Post

MABUHAY PRRD!

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Cure for male mental disability

By Teddy Locsin Jr. / Free Fire

MARKHAM HEID, writing for Men’s Health, reports on recent Dutch research showing that men get stupid in front of, or just anticipating being in front of a woman.

Dutch researchers recruited 71 university students to complete a set of tasks, testing thinking ability.

During one task, the students, male and female, were told they were being watched by someone of the opposite sex, maybe behind a one-way glass.

Without any idea what this observer of the other gender looked like, male thinking powers dropped precipitously.

What does this prove? Fruits of my own self-funded research show that hope springs eternal in men that the woman will look good.

Female thinking, on the other hand, vastly improved when told that a man was watching.

Why the difference in mental performance?

Without the Dutch saying it, or spending the research fund grants they got, we knew.

In the male, the blood rushes down from his head. In the female all the blood rushes up to her head, firing off neurons in the area of mathematical ability as she calculates the odds that the guy is worth it. That’s my research, too. Furthermore, my research shows that there are no smart men looking at the harlots of Amsterdam displaying their wares in glass displays. There is a prevalence of dropped jaws and mouth breathers, as Twitter Ria Roxas says.

But the Dutch maintain, they presume more scientifically, that the ability of men to think splits up between the task at hand and the need to think of a clever thing to say in anticipation of meeting that unseen female observer.

But this seldom works, as the wittiest males are gay. Straight men have no way with words. Trying to appear cool, writes Heidman, quickly drains the male brain.

With women, none of that happens; they all have something unspoken in which the male is definitely interested, if not absorbed. Pudenda. So females withhold judgment. The only question for them is whether the male is interesting in any of three ways: good looks, money, or both.

There is also evolution to take into account. In nature, males strut their stuff before females who merely watch and pick the best. So the burden of proof, like in the Corona impeachment, is always on the pursuing male. And you know where that is going: nowhere.

The effort of carrying this burden of proof subtracts from the thinking capacity of males.

How then to offset the male mental disadvantage?

One way, one author says, is to eat plenty of fruits but not in front of the female; you may drool. Another way is to show self-confidence. But that can be a big mistake. If the male cannot show a sound reason for self-confidence, the female will laugh and tell her friends. Male mental incapacity turns to panic, and then shame. If you were expecting me to provide a cure, there is none. Live with it. Women are superior to men. That is why they bury us. Have you noticed? Widow is a common word but widower rarely, if ever, encountered.

No comments: